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Episode #103 | How to Challenge the "No" Mentality and Say "Yes" to Your Dreams

living your best life mindset and goals the bravehearted woman podcast

BraveHearts, listen to this statistic: by the time you are 17 years old, you have heard the word NO 150,000 times.  According to the same research, you have heard the word YES, ...wait for it... 🥁 What do you think? ... 🥁 🥁 🥁 ... 5000 times!

 

That's right, you get 30 nos’ to every 1 yes by the time you're 17 years old. Do you know what that means? That means that throughout our childhood, our brain has been programmed to hear 'NO.'

No, you can't do it.
No, you can't go.
No, you're not enough.
No, you're not smart enough.
No, you're not wealthy enough.
No, you're not thin enough.
No! No! No! No!

 

 

Growth is part of the human experience.

It's part of human nature. And it's part of our mission on this earth.

When kids are little, we measure them, don't we, we put them up against a wall, we put a ruler next to and we say, Oh, my goodness, you're getting so big, and they smile. And they beam because growth is praised and growth is expected.

If we take our child to the doctor, and the doctor says, "There's something wrong. They're not growing. They're not developing."  We get afraid. We feel panic. We start praying. And there's a CONCERN. Why? Because growth is healthy. 

 

Healthy things grow. 

 

And healthy things CHANGE and healthy things DEVELOP. Healthy things bloom and flourish, and continue to grow. You don't get to a certain age and then just stop. So are you growing? Do you know that you can get rid of all of the long lines of NOs and start saying YES to yourself? 

Yes, I can further my education.
Yes, I can try this new hobby.
Yes, I can invest in myself.
Yes, I can still believe that I have great days ahead of me.

 

In fact, it's my job to make sure that my future is just as brilliant and more exciting and shining and wonderful than everything that I've lived in the past. The past is gone. That's a cycle of life we have to discern the cycles, don't we?

The past is gone. It's over. I can't live there anymore. I have the present. But in a flash, it'll be gone too. 

 

 

 

So I have the future.

What are you going to do with your future? Are you going to let your faith and your purpose and your design be thwarted? Because you start believing in a pack of NO's? No, I can't do that.

Or are YOU going to say NO? I'm tired of the I•CAN'T•tations, as I say, and I learned some of this from Tony Robbins. He used to say, [...we got a lot of incantations or i•can't•tations. Well, how about some I•CAN•tations.] I can do this. I can learn, I can do hard things. I can push myself. I can change my mind. Did you know you get to change your mind? 

 

You can change what you believe. You can grow. You can develop. You can mature.

I used to think this _______. But today, I think this_______.

 

You can do hard things. You can change your mind. You can change your circumstances. You can change the outcomes. You can change your body. Don't believe the fact that your body is just what it is and that's the end of it! You can still shape your body. Don't let that OLD, NEGATIVE, I CAN'T mindset get in your mind.

 

 

 

So I want to ask you a question, BraveHearts, Are you saying NO to your future?

Are you sitting here looking at it and saying, that would be amazing?  I see the future could be incredible, all of these great things are available to me if I put a little work into it. If I dug in if I ignored the NO's. Yes, I know that I could have that.   

BUT I can't do it. I'm too tired. It's too late for me. Too much time has passed. I'm too old. My best days are behind me. Let somebody else go for it. Besides, I don't know that I have what it takes. I FEEL inadequate.
 
 

Do you have a dream that you would love to see come to pass?

 But you keep hearing the, 'No, you can't do it. No, it's not for you. No, it's not your time. It's too late. You don't have enough money.'

Whatever IT is. The 'I'm not something enough.'

 

 

 

We all have heard those in our life. REMEMBER, you've heard 150,000 NOs by the time you were 17 and you've only heard 5000 YESes.

 WHAT IF we said, 'Okay, let's roll with that statistic, if I want 1 YES, I'm going to have to face 30 NOs.'

 

 

How would you then react to failure? Would you embrace the NO's differently? 

Maybe you would be saying, 'NO? Ok. NO. Another no, no problem. NO. Perfect, another NO. I only have four more NO's to go before my breakthrough!' 

 

 

 WATCH THE VIDEO BLOG

 

 

LISTEN TO THE PODCAST

 

Timestamps:
0:00 - Intro
0:23 - Saying ‘YES’ vs ‘NO’
1:25 - How to believe in yourself?
2:23 - How to develop self-esteem?
3:14 - Tips for figuring out your self-identity?
6:30 - Is growth good for you?
8:07 - I CAN vs I CAN’T
9:20 - The story of 12 spies and the promised land in the Bible
11:08 - Are you saying ‘no’ to your future?
12:58 - The SECRET to breakthrough
18:06 - FREE Download: Brave Affirmations for an Abundant Life

 

 

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