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How to Take Pain and Use it to Your Advantage

We all experience pain in life, but we don't all use it for our good. Pain is an amazing motivator. It instantly sends a signal to our brain that says, ‘Whatever you're doing, stop doing this. This hurts. I'm having pain.’ Pain stimulates the brain and that gets us to change—quickly!


Now, pain signals us to stop, and that's for our good, unless the pain is producing a really powerful benefit for us. In that case, the signal to stop is not helpful. We have to push past it.


For example, if you're trying to improve your body and you're exercising, you're undoubtedly going to feel some pain. If you stop every time you feel discomfort, you're not going to get the body that you're hoping for.


Or what if you're trying to reset your metabolism and whenever you feel hunger pains, you say, ‘Oh, I’m starving. I better stop doing this.’ You’ll disrupt your progress. That pain is letting you know that you're entering a zone of transformation and change. Keep pressing, because that's where you're going to reach your goal.  


Sometimes pain is simply, 'Hey, I don't want to turn the TV off. I really want to binge tonight.' But, if you have a personal development plan and a strategy for your growth, you'll have to turn the TV off.

Growing means saying no to some things so you can say YES to your dreams!  


Think about a seed. If a seed doesn't go into the ground and die, it won't produce the good fruit that's inside. So it is with us. It is in our breaking; in the cracking open or the crushing of the “seed “ where our most beautiful fruit is released.


Pain is inevitable. It's part of life.

But misery, that's optional. Suffering, is optional.  


Suffering is our inability to accept the things that we cannot change. It's painful, and it hurts. But the on-going anguish of the soul intensifies because we fight something we cannot change in this lifetime. In that case, I pray you find relief, my friend.



But since we’re going to have pain, let's make it work for us. Honestly, we need to put ourselves in a place of pain. I'm not talking about pain that is unsafe or harmful, but pain with a purpose. Put yourself in a place that makes you say ouch…it hurts so good! Find your edge and push past it.



  • Pain or discomfort does not mean that you are unsafe. The destabilization you feel is crazy and scary, but you're not unsafe. You're just experiencing something new, something you don't know how to control.


  • Being uncomfortable does not mean that you've made a wrong decision. You've made probably a very wise decision or a good decision, and now you're in this unknown territory and you feel like maybe you want to turn around and run back home. You want to stop, you want to quit, or give up. Keep pressing on because discomfort or experiencing pain doesn't mean you're failing. It doesn't mean what you’re doing won’t work. Not at all. If you keep going, you will get results.


  • `Uncomfortable steps of action challenge you. They awaken your brain, so be excited when you feel uncomfortable… you're growing. If you avoid pain and discomfort, then you're putting yourself in a box.. 


The box is the safe zone.

We defend that box with everything in us to protect ourselves.

I've seen it.


I coach women in a box. Fear of pain causes them to push back, resist any challenge. They give a problem for every solution that I offer. ‘Oh, I'm being triggered right now. I don't like when you say that. That triggers me.’

Okay, well stay triggered then. Live in your box. I'm not trying to be insensitive because I have my own triggers, but I also know that sometimes I gotta face those triggers and say, move outta my way. Because you're like a hurdle. A barricade. You're a roadblock in my way. And my reward is on the other side. I can't let you stop me.   


People are in the box when they. Say, ‘Don't push me. I don't wanna be coaxed, and I'll do this when I'm ready and when I decide.’ Well, again, you let intimidation work. When you resist the change agents that wanna come into your life and encourage you and help you to keep moving because you fear pain, you don't like it. Nicely put that means you are stuck. If you're stuck, you are gonna live a mediocre life. Average life and that's a pain of another whole kind because in that box there is a pain in that box. You're not avoiding it, you're just familiar with it because the pain of regret was gonna be such a powerful line just there And I said it that way, the pain of regret is in that box. The unfulfilled purpose is in that box, the death of dreams. Is inside that box. So push yourself to do hard things, befriend pain and discomfort.


Brian Tracy writes a book, it's called Eat That Frog. It is on my recommended reading list of books. In the book, he talks about doing the hard things first in the morning. When you wake up, do the hard thing first. If you'll do that, the rest of your day is gonna be easy because you’ve already conquered the hard thing.

Plus, when you do the hard thing first. You go through your day feeling such a sense of motivation and accomplishment. You're like, ‘Yeah, I got this. I'm kind of cool up in here. I can do this. That's how I'm feeling.’


Make pain your friend. 


Push past your boundaries. Find your edge. Then push some more. Take more territory. Stop living small. God has given us this great, big, beautiful, wonderful life to live, and we're living so small. Don't do that. Don't wait for motivation to start because you're not going to feel like it. You've must find the discipline inside you. Because motivation isn't coming most mornings.


But I'll tell you what does come…easily and often.  Rationalization. Excuse-making.

All the reasons why we can't do something, why it's not good to take this next step, and the justification for giving ourself permission to just chill and take the easy road. That’s what comes automatically!

Your brain, once again detecting a threat says, ‘You're doing something outside your comfort zone. This is not safe. What if you get hurt? What if you die? What if you look stupid? (Which is very close to dying…) What if your reputation is at risk? Discomfort screams to you.


But remember, most likely you are not unsafe. You might be on the edge of something brilliant and a beautiful breakthrough.



So what's your pain tolerance? If you're not experiencing some kind of discomfort in your life I can most assuredly suppose and guess that you are not tapping your potential.


What a sad thing to waste. The beautiful potential that's inside of you. I say it often, ‘I want to die empty.’ I'm gonna unload every book, every song, all the music, every creation, every invention that I possibly can, and leave it on this side of the graveyard. I'm not going to the graveyard with my best song unsung.

You shouldn't either. 

This is your moment. You got one beautiful, fabulous, quirky life to live, so you might as well enjoy it.



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